Monday, August 18, 2014

Sleeves and Crying.

So I have one rule on stage for myself.
As you can tell, that rule isn't, "Don't say stupid stuff on stage," because I do that all of the time (on accident- not purposefully). It's definitely not that one! Just watch the beginning of 9:15am service from last week. You talk about embarrassing......
It also isn't, "Don't make a fool of yourself." My band knows all too well how often I do that.
It isn't, "No dancing," or "I'm going to be awesome all of the time," because I love to dance and I'm kinda bad when I dance!

The rule is - no crying on stage. I don't know what's up with me, but I totally get wierded out when people cry on stage, even if it's for legit reasons! I get all emotionally closed up when people cry in movies. I don't know what's wrong with me, but I just don't like it! I think I'm like a man in that way. Have you ever seen someone start crying in front of a man who suddenly doesn't know what to do with his hands or what to say? -Yeah.. That's me.
Some call it being emotionally stunted or cold.
They're probably right.

So this week, I was really caught off guard when I started to tear up during the offering song. I've been singing along with this song and studying the song for weeks, but it wasn't until I was singing it in front of everyone that it really hit me.
Which made me REALLY mad, but also really glad that God showed me a new way of seeing Him.

Here are the lyrics.

It's there on a wedding day
There in the weeping by the graveside
 There in the very breath we breathe
Your grace grace
Oh such grace
The same for the rich and poor
The same for the saint and for the sinner
Enough for this whole wide world
Your great grace
Oh such grace!

As I started singing verse 2, I thought about my life over the past year. 
I thought about my wedding day and how God's grace and presence was so palpable.
I thought about two months before that day when we laid my grandmother to rest. We wept at the graveside and felt God's presence there.
I thought about all of my friends- rich, poor, saints and sinners and how God's grace is covering each of them and shining through them in my life. 
I thought about the months where we've had plenty and months where we've inched by with God's help.
I though about the times where I did the right thing and the times when I messed up horribly. 
My life has been kind of a roller coaster over the last year. It's been one of the most memorable, shaping and wonderful years that I've ever had and as I reflected, I saw God's grace through the darkest lows and the brightest highs. 
So today, I encourage you to look back on your life. Think about your wedding day and the day you wept by the graveside. Think about all of the spans of your life and thank God for the grace that you didn't even know was there at the time. 
And it'll be okay to cry. 
Just not around me. 
Just kidding :).
Yesterday, August 17th, we sang:
"Alive in Us" by Hillsong
"At the Cross (Love Ran Red)" by Chris Tomlin
"Your Grace Finds Me" by Matt Redman
and "Your Grace is Enough" by Matt Maher
Oh. And I forgot about the one other rule I have on stage! I always have to wear sleeves. My momma  pulled me aside one day when I was young and said, "No one wants to see your armpits on stage. Wear sleeves!" and goodness knows that my momma is always right! So you're welcome. You can thank her for that!

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